Vacation

               Last weekend, Shelby and I went on a vacation to Capitol Reef. That was the first vacation I have taken since 2020. Don't get me wrong, I have taken a day off here or there. Usually it is a recovery day after or a concert or to take on a bigger project that requires an extra day. I have worked full-time since I was 16 years old. Back then, when the family took time off for a trip, I just stayed home and worked. It's like it never clicked that I am a people too, and I deserve to go do things. 

                  I read something today that struck a cord with me. Do what you need to do for you. If you need to cut your food into tiny pieces before you eat it, do it. If turning the font size on the Kindle up makes reading more enjoyable, do it. If you need to write something on your hand to help you remember it, do it. Do what you need to do to make life more enjoyable of functional. Be unapologetic about it, if it helps you, just do it. 

                Life is too short to worry what others might think. Don't hold back because you think others will judge you. Live how you need to for you. In a world full of influencers, be the uninfluenced. Just be the weird you want and need to be. 

              For me, I need to be better about taking time off and seeing more of the world. I am great at working my life away. I am bad at taking time out to explore. Self work is never actually done. That is not a bad thing like I used to think it was. If you aren't progressing, you are dying. As much as I joke about that, I am not ready.

                I have therapy tomorrow. My first session since the loss of Ruger. I am ready for it, but not entirely excited. Processing the past and releasing emotions is exhausting. I know it is good for me, but damn is it hard. I hope Jackie is better at this than I was at her age. Sometimes we never really know what's wrong until someone helps us from the outside in to find the problem.  

    

                I am excited to announce that I have kept my goal of reading one book a month for six months now. I have found myself on the struggle bus with that goal at times, but it is important to me that I accomplish it. The Pocket Life Coach might not be the world's best self-help book. It might make you have a few oh shit moments, but it did help me look at goals in a different light. It is easy to make a list of buzz words and good ideas. It takes, though, to make goals that you not only want to accomplish but can build a road map to doing. 

Bishop :(: